Follow the Leader, leader, leader...

Leadership

Boil the jug. Snuggle under the blankets and get out the Wheatie bag, cause its STORYTIME!!!

Every year over the weekend of Easter there is this big event called Easter Camp. For the last few years I have been going as a camper, but this year was my first time as a leader.

Even though I was stoked to be going, I went into it completely drained: mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. I had just come out of a wave of assignments and all that fun jazz (aka. Life in general…)

As a small group leader I had the honour of being grouped with a legit as group of girls. However on that first day, I’m not gonna lie, I totally had a little freak out. Each of these girls had come from different backgrounds, social groups and beliefs, and somehow a rather I needed to figure out  a way in which I could lead that would allow them to have the best time at camp.

Let me reiterate, I was SHATTERED, DRAINED AND STRESSED going into camp….

But, and this is where it gets super trippy…I remember spending the majority of the bus ride down, wondering and praying about how on earth I was going to last the next five days running on complete empty.

 Over the course of those 5 days something happened within each of those gorgeous girls. I got to see each of them for who they REALLY were. Not who they were amongst their friends. The stigmas created by society dropped and I realised the reality, that each of us are beautiful when we are our true selves. Often we hide it away, worried that no one will accept us for who we are. And that’s where it hit me.

These girls showed me what being a leader was REALLY about.

You see, leadership isn’t something fancy, it doesn’t mean you are more ‘enlightened’ or ‘elite’. To lead means to merely be yourself, so much so, that it gives others/those around you the permission to do the same. Be themselves.

A ‘good’ leader will lead out of their own strength; however an ‘excellent’ leader will lead out of His strength.

You see, it’s not about the title. It’s not about how many people follow you. It actually isn’t even about you, necessarily.

Sounds super cheesy, but to be perfectly honest I want to be a leader like Jesus (Christ, not the guy that used to date Madonna…I wonder what he’s up to these days…). He led out of a place of love. He saw the potential in others even when they couldn’t see it themselves. He challenged, but he also supported. Flip, the guy got down and washed the feet of his followers (pretty yuck, imagine where they would have been.)

Now, I don’t know about you, but that is the kind of leadership I aspire too. A life lived out of seeing others grow into their potential. It’s not about being the one that everyone exalts.

Society identifies leadership as the person who is exalted, or looked up to by others. Sure that may be a by-product of leadership, but I don’t think it should be the definition of it. Some of the greatest leaders are the ones that chug along, unrecognised by others. Those are the ones you want to follow.

To finish up, just a little thought: What if leadership isn’t exclusive to those that possess ‘leadership’ qualities, what if, in fact, each of us are ‘leaders’ in our own right. We each are in a position of influence.

We have our family, friends; and our choices do impact them. Whether you believe you have something to offer or not, you are significant. You may never see the bountiful fruit of what you invest into, but nonetheless, don’t be discouraged. Some of the greatest influencers never saw the fruit of their work, yet they choose to carry on steadfast, led by the drive of the dream.

Try not to forget how cool you are this week, okay?

Peace and blessings y’all!

Speak to me

If there is one thing I hate it’s writers block. It’s like a hurricane circulating inside a glass ball, thoughts running wild in your head and yet, somehow it is impossible to put them on the page.

For the past year I have been quietly chugging away at my first novel, and have become all too familiar with writer’s block. You so long to conceptualise what is going on in your head and yet words just won’t do. The only way I can describe writing would be like being pregnant; you carry this story, your baby, for so long. You feel it move within as it kicks around, yet no one can fully understand what is going on. There may be physical signs of it; dark hollowed eyes, coffee breath and the lack of make-up, yet no one really knows. Until the day it is released. Your work is published, launched out into the mercies of the world. Like a mother you do your best to protect your baby but nothing can hide it from the criticisms or the encouragements that you may receive. It is there were you find out what you are truly made of. That is where you begin you’re parenting, cultivating the potential it has until others can see and understand your baby like you do.

But it is not easy. Writing is harsh. It is brutal. Last December I printed off the first 137 pages to my book, but the victory was short-lived. What I had in my hands needed attention, so much so I had to wipe the slate clean and start again. It hurts, is painful, yet with it comes liberation. It is an art, a way in which we can conceptualise and process thoughts. It is like a dear friend who you tell you’re secrets too.

We are surrounded by it. The songs we sing, the movies we watch, the businesses we shop from; all coming from a sheet of blank paper. A masterpiece waiting to be written.

I have come to appreciate it; writing has the ability to persuade, to agitate and to provide comfort. It is an alluring companion that strikes when we least expect it. This, this post is a reflection of that, here I sit in the library (my escapism) and can’t help but be overwhelmed by the capacity in which words affect us. I have always loved reading, but saw little relevance in it, particularly in the busyness of life. However recently I have been challenged with the reality that if I long to grow more in knowledge and acceptance of others, then maybe I should pursue after the truths I long to acquire and maybe, just maybe, the answers I seek might just be behind one of these paperback books.

In order for this to happen: our ability to grow. It is based on our ability to seek. To sit in the silence. For it is in the silence in which clarity can be found.

Often we resent the silence, because our interpretation of knowledge has been perceived as the amount of words we say. Quantitative rather than qualitative.

But what if silence is a reflection of peace. You see when we reflect and ‘live’ in the past it grows bitterness and resentment, likewise if we ‘live’ in the future, always thinking about what decision we need to make in order to end up where we want to go, then we grow anxious and worried. However, when we live in the present recognising the value of each moment: ‘Capre Diem’, then true peace is found. So silence, rather than being a bad thing, may just be a by-product of peace.

 Silence, cease it, and make time for it, for it is within the silence we may just find the answers we look for.

Not a God to FIND praise, a God TO BE praised.

Not a God to FIND praise, a God TO BE praised.

I’m very narcissistic. I get very proud and arrogant. I love to receive praise and I even plead for praise from God.

It’s painful, because it is true and sometimes truth may taste bitter at first , but that is just the medicine part required before deeper healing can occur.  

This post is a bit different and I’m gonna give it to you pretty straight because in reality, we (I) tend to fluff things up,  make them sound pretty and nice, so be prepared. Here we go.

 

God has a purpose. A plan so big, so endearing. He is at work, in fact it is happening right now as we speak. The restoration of his kingdom. However….

Reality check numero uno:

·         It’s not actually ALL about us.

We ARE important, to a certain extent. Mercy and Grace, two words chucked around Christian circles a lot; words which encompass a small fraction of God’s character. But to be perfectly honest, in sermons and talks I find they always appear as superficial words. Words with little substance, just chucked in to paint a cool picture of God. Labels. However, what if those words contain something far more personal than what we first perceive.

Look at it like this:

·         A farmer one day decides to bring in an apprentice, someone who he’ll train up in hopes that eventually, he (the apprentice) can run the farm.

·         As the apprentice is being trained up he will often refer back to the farmer asking for his approval, double checking that what he is doing is right.

·         However, after 6-12 months on the job you’d imagine the apprentice would be pretty clued up on what to do (or at least have a general understanding of what to do).

·         However, wouldn’t it seem odd if, after 12 months of working this apprentice, continued to refer back to the farmer in the same manner he did when he was being trained up? I imagine it would really test the farmer’s patience, particularly when you consider the time taken to walk back and find the farmer. Time which could be spent working. In all honesty, I imagine the farmer’s probably thought a few times, “why don’t I just do the job myself?”

Why doesn’t he?

That my friend is mercy.

Despite the Lord having the capacity to do it (restore his kingdom on earth), he chooses us. His grace and mercy is a tangible reflection of his patience towards us. Even though we doubt and question EVERYTHING about God, he still chooses us. He still chooses to make time for us. Can you imagine how frustrating (if God was a human with limited human characteristics) that would be.

1.       This reflects exactly why God is God and we are not. WE are far too limited. So limited in our understanding of grace and mercy, that even when a God so abundantly merciful is standing right in front of us, we don’t even see it. (PS: I share this because it’s totally something God is revealing to me as well. Certainly don’t have this down pact yet, may never, nonetheless he is pulling me up on this too.)

In our western culture, it is difficult to not perceive ourselves as God. Our culture thrives off, it’s created from it; making us believe we are the most important thing out. So much so that our thinking towards death is “if we are gone what will happen in this world, ‘the world will forever be ruined.’” I reckon it’s chasing after those things, ourselves, which make us forgettable. Only the ones who chased after something beyond themselves are the ones remembered, yet even then, that in itself is insignificant.

What if….we were to live a life for Him. A life far from boring and mundane.

Want a life of remembrance; lived to its capacity?

1.       It starts with submission and surrender- realising that actually we ARE blessed. God could easily complete his plan right now if he wanted to, but he is PATIENT, teaching us and using us, mere humans, selfish beings, to reflect HIM.

2.       A radical life is understanding that there will be sacrifice and suffering. Realistically in every aspect of life these elements will pop up:

·         Sacrifice

·         Suffering

The question is whether we think God is worth making a sacrifice and suffering for. If not, then what is?

I don’t know about you, but I would much rather live each day radically, uncertain of what will happen in my day, but certain of who I live for, then live the stereotypical ‘Sunday attending church’ life.

Imagine if each of us recognised that we are a part of something significant, the picture of  ‘Christianity’ would look a little different. We ourselves aren’t the ones that define that significance, we just have the choice and opportunity to facilitate in that significance: seeing GOD (not us) be exalted. In whatever form that may be.

Just some food for thought.

PG huh?!? No silly, PGA.

PG huh?!? No silly, PGA

 

When I was younger I took golf lessons.

My dad would take my brother and I down to the local golf course every Saturday morning, where we learnt all about how to hit the ball, perfect our swing and pretend to be Tiger Woods (the golfing part…wouldn’t condone the other stuff to 5 yr olds…). One of the random ‘drills’ we had to do, was place a big smiley face sticker on the head of the club. Now, at the time, I thought the sticker was there just to look super cool, but it wasn’t until recently that I realised that that sticker actually had a purpose.

It was to identify the ‘sweet spot’.

Sweet spot?!?!

Pretty much, there is a particular point along the head (the part of the golf club you hit the ball with) which when you hit it, makes the ball project further, seemingly ‘effortlessly’. If your golf is anything like mine (with maybe 5 out of 100 shots hitting that sweet shot) you’ve probably stood at the driving range looking out over the ball, placing your hand upto shield the sun, as you ponder why you haven’t joined the PGA tour (or at least how your golden talent remains yet to be discovered.)

So we’re feeling good about ourselves! Yeah! We hit that little sucker and it just so happened a cute boy walked passed at the same time and saw the whole thing! (Dying.)

HOWEVER…

When we don’t hit it in that sweet spot:

1.       Blimey, it hurts the hands (I’m a girl, I can claim that.)

2.       To get the ball even remotely close to the other one, A LOT more effort and strength is needed.

 

Soooooooooo…

I imagine at this point you’re probably wondering where I’m heading with this…

 

Soooooooooo pretty much:

 

 Knowing who we are can be just like finding that ‘sweet spot’ in life.

 

Let me explain:

A few months ago I bumped into a guy that I went to high school with. We had a little mini catch up (as you do) then he started explaining his engineering degree to me, talking about all the complex stuff he was learning in it. As you can imagine my brain exploded (not literally, thank goodness!) How this guy could come up with a draw bridge based off numbers and variables was totally beyond me. I had to remind myself on several occasions to shut my mouth again (because I was amazed at just how smart he was.)

Anyway, when we got to town, we went and got a coffee, which is where he randomly piped up and said “Hey Aspen, this has to be the best conversation I’ve had in a while. You’re really good at communicating.” Wasn’t too hard to be honest, but “Ill receive that compliment anyway.” (I didn’t actually say that. I mean who says “I receive that any way?” Oh….you do Cindy…woops sorry.)

I guess the point I’m trying to make is, I’m not my friend that’s an engineer. He’s talented at engineering. I’m talented at talkin…..g. (Is that even a talent? I don’t know, but I’ll claim it anyway.)

 

You see when we do things we are naturally talented and gifted in, it’s like hitting that ball in the sweet spot. Sure a little work is required, but it feels effortless.

 

Now this is gonna sound pretty harsh, but all too often, it seems, we are trying to achieve things that we just aren’t naturally gifted in. Sure there are times when you’ve got to just suck it up (and work on those assignments), but if your WHOLE DEGREE or job is a drag then why carry on?

Chase after the things you enjoy and are gifted in and watch how far you, like the ball soar (yes, I did just compare you to a golf ball. You’re a lot better-looking though, in my defence). Rather than strive at doing something which we may not get as much enjoyment out of, why not recognise the areas we are talented in and strengthen those areas in our lives.

It’s easy sometimes to forget that we are each uniquely encoded with different talents and gifts. These talents are needed. You are needed and valued. What you have to offer, even if it feels minuet, is actually very important. Imagine if the guy who invented aeroplanes didn’t wake up one day (probably more like a series of trial and error) and gave up. We would never have had aeroplanes (Yes, someone else MAY have come along and designed one anyway, but that’s beyond the point). That guy was needed, because he may just have been the one to suggest inflight entertainment, and imagine how horrible that would have been without that! (*cough* Jetstar *cough*)

At the end of the day, you’re important. The things you have, talents you possess are valued and needed in this big bad (not bad all the time) world.

 

Cool beans. Just a thought. 

 Peace and blessings y’all.

"I'm over our long term relationship. No judgement."

Spring cleaning. It has its pits and peaks.

 Pit: Apparently it only comes around in spring, which sucks cause if I left my room for a whole year without a good spring clean, I think you could comfortably call me a hoarder.

Peak: Every time you do you uncover some hidden gems; cell phone charger, hair ties, and your teddy bear you thought had gone off on some overseas adventure…

So, I guess you could say spring cleaning does have some perks.

The other day I was doing a bit of a good old clean up, and came across my folder I put all my written stories into. As you’ve probably (hopefully) discovered… I like to write, and have for a wee while. Actually, fun fact, when I was 10 I started to write a book I got about 30 pages into it, before I decided I just didn’t have the time to continue (don’t ask me why I didn’t have time, I was 10. I had all the time in the world!).

Anyway in amongst the masses of paper, I uncovered one of the poems I wrote a little while back (here’s a little snippet):

 

“You see I looked down on those I thought I was above,

And in my head,

I started to justify it as love.

 

With my distorted view,

I started to think that God looked down on us too,

Only able to come and love a few.

 

Only those like me,

Who knew the verses,

Who knew the bible,

And in my head I was the perfect disciple.

 

It was there I learnt I was an actor,

I’d put my hands up at church,

Sing the right notes,

Like that was the only factor.

 

But my quest to be perfect,

To meet the perfection,

 It only led my mind

Into a sickly infection.

 

Then I’d turn to God and point my finger,

Why’d you make me fat?

Why couldn’t I be smaller?

Because only then,

Could I truly be your daughter.

 

I’d pray and pray,

Oh God, send me a boyfriend,

Oh God, send me an angel,

Because I alone am unable.

 

I knew they wouldn’t help,

I knew it to well,

But my deepest confessions,

To Him I couldn’t tell.”

 

As you have probably gathered, my own perceived judgement of others and myself was something I was really challenged with when I wrote this poem.  But unlike the poem changing it wasn’t as easy as spray and wipe, where BAM and the dirt is gone.

You see it’s easy to judge. It’s easy to look down on others, just because they’re different. I’ll be honest, throughout high school I did just that, look down on others because I thought I was maybe ‘better’ then them. I didn’t do drugs, drink or swear, and those I justified were the things that defined me as ‘better.’

However, looking back it saddens me because I allowed my own judgements and perceptions to be so important, that it left little room to actually see people for who they were. Awesome. Unique. Rich in potential.

You see it’s easy for us to look at someone and stamp a label on. Limit them, or define them. Whether it’s based on actions or their past, I’ve come to learn that limiting others is toxic.

 

Like the poem said:

“With my distorted view,

I started to think that God looked down on us too,

Only able to come and love a few.

 

Only those like me,

Who knew the verses,

Who knew the bible,

And in my head I was the perfect disciple.”

 

As horrid as it sounds, I allowed myself to play the role of God, to be the one who filtered who was good enough. Because of this my perception of church became the place where all the ‘perfect people’ met. It seemed like everyone had it altogether. I mean they smiled and seemed happy. Ironically this contradicted how I actually felt, but I quickly found myself slipping into an ‘act,’ trying to play the ‘perfect little Christian girl’ cause that would mean my real hurts wouldn’t be discovered. It comes as little surprise that because of this, I grew bitter towards the idea of ‘church’ as I lodged my thoughts deeper away.

The irony of it though, was the further I pulled away, the more distant I felt from God and alone as a whole. The truth is God loves real. The performance. The façade. Totally irrelevant, and will not change how much he love us. He sees our hearts, he sees the hurt, and longs to journey with us. Haha he’s cool like that, when we think no one could ever cope with us, he says ‘try me’.

Since high school I’ve come to the conclusion, that I want to be more like Jesus (not because of doctrine, or ‘perfect Christian role model’), but because he was cool. He didn’t allow anything (race, religion, sexual orientation) to define how much he could love or care for someone. That’s the kind of person I want to be, one who loves instead of judges.

However unlike spring cleaning, which comes around once a year, choosing to love instead of judge is a daily decision, but by lying down my pre-conceived ideas and allowing love to be my driving force, it brings a lot peace into life.

Take care cool kids, y’all are awesome.

Oh Honey boo boo

Child-like faith. Mark 10:13-16 talks about this idea of having a 'child-like faith' when it comes to our relationship to God, but to be quite frank what is this kind of faith??

Often I thought it referred to maintain a 'child-like' mentality in which conversations with God consisted of 'baby talk' eg: turn to him for provision, wants, needs, desires etc. This is true and should totally be done as well, but when I began to think about it, it doesn't leave a lot of room for growth.

 

As we grow up our child-like faith also grows.

Okay, I'll try and make this a bit more clear cause it probably doesn't make a lot of sense at the moment.

Thought: What if what Jesus was talking about in regards to faith, wasn't about having an immature, needy faith, but child-like in sense that when we see God and see his will done we are bewildered and in genuine awe.

              Eg: a child has such an innocence in which everything in the world around them is new and  

                     exciting. They don't take for granted the small things like 'Choo choo trains' or 'trees.'

                     Even the most simplest of things are incredible.

SO if we look at it like that, maybe what 'child-like' faith is, is seeing the small everyday things God has done and being amazed and appreciative of it. What if we got excited about the small things rather than focus on the massive 'experience' or miracle we expect God to bring along?

In a nutshell, child-like faith is being appreciative for the small things which may seem mundane, and well ordinary. However it is in those things where more of God's massive character is revealed.

Try not to measure God simply on how big the 'experience' is, for even those 'experiences' limit who God truly is, and is only reveals an ever so small portion of who he is.